Independent Surrogacy

I thought surrogacy was out of reach. I was wrong.

After years of infertility and a mountain of debt, agency prices put surrogacy off the table. So we did it ourselves — for about 75% less.

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Whitney with her surrogate

My surrogate and me. I wouldn't be a mom without her.

$150k+ What an agency runs you
$30–92k What you should expect to pay
$54.99 What this guide costs

I spent eight years battling infertility and repeat pregnancy loss. Seven IVF cycles. A few bouts of OHSS, a few surgeries, five miscarriages. By the end of it I was tired, in debt, and just about out of hope.

Surrogacy was the path forward, but every agency I called quoted six figures. A hundred and fifty thousand dollars or more. After everything we'd already spent, that number didn't feel like a door. It felt like a wall.

So we did it on our own. We hired the experts we actually needed — the attorney, the clinic, the counselor — and skipped the agency markup in the middle. With a lot of patience and some hard work, I finally became a mom, thanks to my angel surrogate.

I wrote down everything I learned, in order, so the next person doesn't have to figure it out from scratch the way I did. It works. It worked for me.

This guide is for you if

It's an honest fit for some people and not others. Here's who it's for.

What's inside

You don't need an agency to have experts in your corner

You'll still have professionals helping you. The difference is you're your own project manager — and that's where the savings come from. The guide shows you exactly how.

Start to finish

The step-by-step process

Every stage in order, from surrogacy basics to the legal agreement and counseling and everything in between. So you always know what comes next.

Screening

How to screen a surrogate

Someone being willing isn't the same as being the right fit. The questions to ask and the steps to take, so you choose well.

Legal

How to hire an attorney

Your attorney is one of the most important people in this. Tips and a full list of questions to ask before you hire.

Money

Budget & cost info

What you need to pay for, why, and ideas for how to cover it — plus real cost scenarios so the numbers actually make sense.

Finding

How to find a surrogate

Tips and advice for finding a surrogate on your own, drawn from how we did it ourselves.

Support

Access to a private group

A private group just for intended parents. Ask questions, get support, and talk to people walking the same road.

About Whitney

I'm not some random person writing about this philosophically. I lived it.

Eight years of infertility and repeat pregnancy loss. Seven IVF cycles, a few surgeries, five miscarriages, and a lot of nights I wasn't sure we'd get here. Right before I was ready to lose all hope, I turned to surrogacy even though it seemed impossible — and we found a way to do it on our own.

I stay involved in infertility and surrogacy advocacy, and I've volunteered with RESOLVE for years in different capacities. I live in Virginia with my husband, Erick, our twins, and a weimaraner.

I've already done the research and the homework on the financial, legal, and medical pieces — so you don't have to.

From intended parents

People who started right where you are

I was diagnosed with uterine cancer eight weeks after the birth of my last child. After treatment and a hysterectomy, I kept one ovary hoping to complete our family. I'm ready to start now — scared to death too — and your guide was so helpful as I tried to understand the laws here.

Nicole Intended Mother

I was so happy to find your guide. I had no idea where to start and couldn't afford an agency. I'm excited to get to work, and I have hope that we can actually do this.

Andrew Intended Father

We were on the last steps of egg-donor IVF when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. A surrogate is probably our only way of having a child. The process and the expense seem so insurmountable at times — thank you for the information.

Vanessa Intended Mother
The complete guide

The Complete Guide to Independent Surrogacy

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Everything I learned doing this myself, written down in order.

Here's the math, since adjectives won't do it justice.

An agency runs $150,000 or more. Doing it independently, most people should expect somewhere between $30,000 and $92,000 — and I made it work for $27,600. Even at the high end, that's a savings of around $60,000, for a guide that costs $54.99.

I've already done the financial, legal, and medical homework so you don't have to start from zero the way I did. If this could give you a chance at a biological child — or a child of your own at all — that's the question worth sitting with.